Awê Ma Se Kinnes!

Ga-Gwa!!! Covid Positive! Soema net soe!  

I wish I could say I was in absolute shock but I wasn’t. I was in absolute disappointment, yes but shock, no. I have become acutely aware of the fact that it’s very tricky to stay out of the destructive path of Aunty Rona.  The only way to not meet and greet this vicious number is to stay home.  The second you unbolt that trellidoor, anything is possible.

In my head, if Aunty Rona was a person I imagine that she would look like Alexis from Dynasty. A classic bitch that permi causes kak and just won’t go away.

So I wake up one morning more than 2 weeks ago and I feel a little bit off. Now at my fabulously feisty age, waking up and feeling a little off is not the most unusual thing in the world. I more than likely would have written it off to a tequila hangover, except that I had very rarely been partying during the pandemic, there’s been very little reason to.  And also, it’s just weird opening a bottle of tequila if you can’t share it with 15 other maskless friends before breaking into Whitney Houston songs.

My partner Anwar reassured me that it’s probably his flu that he passed on to me. Well Anwar then decided that maybe he should go for one of those quick Covid tests. It came back negative. And a few days later he was fit as a fiddle and flaunting around the kitchen in city bowl gym wear. So of course, I thought must just be having a little flu headache.

No breathing problems. No fever. No loss of smell or taste.

When I suddenly took a 2-hour nap in the middle of day and woke up tired, with a scratchy throat, I took myself for THAT test. At which point Alexis hoisted a Rothmans and held it mid-air and thought to herself: “let me quickly fock up this one’s day.”

I live in gratitude that my symptoms were very mild. Essentially a semi-permanent little headache and not much else, I’m guessing it’s that one Pfizer jab. I now have to postpone the second one but yirre, can that day come already. While pondering on the new date for my second Pfizer jab, I suddenly remembered, that pre-pandemic, when we spoke about Pfizer, we were whispering about a connection for Viagra. A Pfizer jab of a very different kind.

I received overwhelming love and support after I spoke about my Covid status on social media. The surprise for me was twitter. Because while I have a decent amount of followers on twitter, I don’t engage much on that platform, it’s a hectic space. You have to tread very carefully in that land. People are ready to tell you your moer quick-quick. Zero time for Maya Angelou quotes there ☺

But wow, when I posted about my Rona test result, twitterati came to life! Twitter loves a good ol’ fiery vaccine debate! Don’t come here with your pictures of snow and roses, go pose with your puppies on insta! ☺

So I move forward very cautiously, masked up and grateful for every sunrise. But I’ll post that pic on the gram.

Happy Women’s Day to Women all over World. Well to all women, except Aunty Rona. She can now gerus put out her entjie and mince. Ashes for that one. Over it.